| Author |
lame jokes go here |
Mersenne Twister
Fleet Admiral
Joined: May 11, 2003
Posts: 1161
From: Sector C Test Labs and Contol Facilities
|  Posted: 2009-08-29 11:45
Two peanuts were walking down a spooky road at night... One was assaulted.
A termite walks into a bar room and asks, "Is the bar tender here?"
"Waiter! This coffee tastes like mud."
"Yes sir, it's fresh ground."
What's brown and sticky? A stick.
Why are proctologists so gloomy?
They always have the end in sight.
What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
Roamin' Catholic.
What did the apple say to the orange?
Nothing stupid, apples don't talk.
What do you do with a dog that has no legs?
Take him out for a drag.
Why can't a chicken coop have more than 2 doors?
Because if it had 4 doors it would be a chicken sedan.
Famous last words of a mafia hitman: "Who put the violin in the violin case?"
How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb?
What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car?
Robin, get in the car.
What's brown and sounds like a bell? Dung.
What do you call a guy who never farts in public?
A private tutor.
What do you call spending the afternoon with a cranky rabbit?
A bad hare day.
Have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower?
That's because he hides well.
What was the centerpiece of the annual Anorexia and Bulimnia sufferers convention?
A cake jumping out of a girl.
here do kings keep their armies?
In their sleevies.
Why don't anteaters get sick?
Because they're full of anty-bodies.
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I wouldn't screw with it if I were you. The doctor already holds you in poor favor. Messing with this might really fry his shorts.
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YIIMM
Grand Admiral
Joined: June 16, 2005
Posts: 851
From: Barcino, Hispania Tarraconensis
| Posted: 2009-08-29 14:19
Why did the girl fall off the swing?
She had no arms.
Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
It was dead.
Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?
It was holding onto the first monkey.
Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree?
It thought it was a game.
What's sad about a bus load of lawyers going over a cliff with three empty seats?
They were my friends.
[ This Message was edited by: YIIMM [R33] on 2009-08-29 14:19 ]
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Little Pet Slinki
Admiral
Joined: April 16, 2006
Posts: 836
From: United Kingdom, South West.
| Posted: 2009-08-30 22:04
What is white and doesn't climb trees?
A fridge.
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